Wednesday, November 5, 2008

Most Missing Complaints Turn Out to be Live-in Relationships in Chennai, India

live-in relationshipThere is an increasing number of “missing women” complaints in Chennai. The fact that most of them are traced as live-in relationships is a matter of growing concern, because the value system and institution of marriage in India is very stringent for women. In spite of people talking about women liberation in India, not many women are able to gain respect if they go against the society. Indian society is dominated by men. According to Indiatimes.com in Chennai, this year itself, 292 “missing women" complaints were registered in the city police station. Police managed to trace 239 women, out of which most of them were related to "live-in relationship" issues. Out of 118 “missing women” complaints registered at the suburban police stations in Chennai, 86 women were found living with their partners before marriage. In yet another case registered in Ambattur on Tuesday, a 22-year-old woman eloped with a 50-year-old married man and married him in Puducherry.

Personally, I do not support live-in relationships or forceful marriages. In India, one of the reasons most of the young female adults are compelled to live with their partners before marriages are because they are forced to marry someone whom their families select for them. Girls’ consent does not matter to the families. The debate still continues that in selecting bridegrooms, families seek girls' good future. Legally, as soon as girls cross their teens they are free to take their own decisions. Statistics of ' missing women' complaints and stories of those traced reveal that most of the women who took conscious live-in relationship decisions were employed and financially independent.

Charlotte Bankruptcy lawyer said "In most of the developing countries live-in relationship is perceived as stigma on the girls and their families. According to law, women after crossing the age of 18 are independent to take their decisions, whether right or wrong."

Chennai police warns about the dangers involved in live-in relationships. Women choosing it should have knowledge about the problems they might face. A Chennai police official said "We often get complaints from women who elope with their lovers and are later disappointed. We then book the lover under charges of rape, as in most cases the girls would have been sexually exploited. Chennai's young women may be bold enough to choose their partners, but often they can't handle the situation when ditched. They end up being unwanted by their families too." A social worker in India said "Past experience has proved that co-habiting couples have more conflicts and are unhappy even when they eventually marry. The rejection of families and friends is hard to bear and creates stress in such relationships."

Women who opt for live-in relationships should be aware of the disadvantages associated with these relationships. If they are ditched by their partners they cannot be easily be accepted by their families or the society. They might face social abandonment. They need to be strong enough to bear the consequences if left by their partners. Lawrenceville sex crimes lawyer said "There are many cases of women having live-in relationships facing domestic violence. The laws of the United States of America protect women against these criminal acts." It is hard for the women in India to prove rape or sexual assault cases, if they have live-in relationships. Indian legal system gives lawful wives status to women having live-in relationships for a certain period of time and their kids the right to legally inherit their fathers’ properties. But claiming the rights are not as simple as it sounds. Many legal proofs are required in which a woman’s self respect is completely shattered. It can break a woman completely. I don’t think Indian society is bold enough to accept cohabitant couples.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

I recently read a story where women in India are fighting back against many crimes against women.

its great: http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/south_asia/5160846.stm

Anonymous said...

In the United States there are prenuptial agreements that give the couples right in the financial assets before getting married. So for a couple who is not married but planning to do so, entering into a prenuptial agreement gives mental and financial security.

Anonymous said...

Couples when entering into live-in relationships do not think that things could go wrong in future. It is true with marriages too. That is why it is essential to understand the legal rights of unmarried couples. Prenuptial agreements make relationships stronger. Discussing money matters can help to improve relationship quality and promote effective communication when the couple plans to get married.

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